I have such a conflicted relationship with zucchini. I have read countless tales of neighbors passing off the excesses of their zucchini crop to one another. I have seen beautiful expansive plants in my friend’s gardens. I have lusted after their zucchini blossoms and loved the gifts of zucchini bread. How hard, therefore, can it be to grow zucchini?

Harder than you would think, at least for me. The first year, my plants never made it past a few feeble blossoms before developing a mold that had them brown, shriveled and goopy. The second year I moved them into raised beds and watched them carefully. But somewhere between the first and second round of fruits, once again they turned brown and died.

This year, Caine (the contractor at my house) built me some raised beds which shine above all others. Carefully lined underneath, new soil prepped for success and the sunniest spot imaginable. I only planted two plants to make sure they had enough room to grow. And at first they thrived but then, sure enough, shortly after they started producing, they were attacked by cutworms, cucumber beetles and squash worms all at the same time!

The stem of this plant has been almost completely shredded by cutworm. It seems unlikely that it will survive.

I have to say it looked dire. By the time I realized what was going on the stems of the plants had been almost completely eaten through. So (don’t judge me) I sprayed the heck out of those bugs.

And then I went on vacation. I came home to this:

That, my friends, is a 5 lb zucchini flanked by two slightly smaller 3 pounders.

Time to take action.

I start with Zucchini Bread.

Because the squash is so large, I cut it in half and scoop out the seeds before I grate it.

Depending on the size of your zucchini you may want to scoop out the seeds which will be tough and bitter

I like to use half coarsely grated squash and half finely grated. The fine grate makes it super moist and the coarse grate gives the bread those beautiful flakes of green color running throughout.

My oil of choice is olive oil for the hearty flavor which can stand up to the spice. And the spice in this case is cardamom which has a distinct earthy, citrusy flavor. It raises the taste (and smell) of this zucchini bread out of the rut of cinnamon and nutmeg and into the nethersphere.

Finally, dates. Gooey, rich dates which melt into the bread and in your mouth. (Can you tell I am enthusiastic about this bread?). The trick with dates is to toss them in a little of the flour mixture before dicing them. This will make them less likely to stick your knife as well as keeping them from clumping together in the batter.

Put it all together with some flour, honey and eggs and into the oven. Zucchini magic!

One zucchini down, two to go! (I’ll deal with those tomatoes later).

Ingredients

2 cups flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
½ tsp salt
1 tsp ground cardamom
2 tbsp lemon zest
½ cup olive oil
½ cup honey
1/3 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup finely grated zucchini
1 cup coarsely grated zucchini
¾ cups chopped dates

Instructions

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease an 8x5 loaf pan
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, cardamom and lemon zest. Toss the chopped dates in 1 tbsp of the flour mixture. This will stop them from clumping together in the batter.
In another bowl, beat together the oil, sugar and honey until well blended. Add the eggs, one at a time, mixing between each addition.
Add the wet ingredients to the flour mixture and stir together until just mixed. Fold in the zucchini and the dates.
Pour the batter into your prepared loaf pan and cook until a knife inserted into the center comes out clean. 45-55 minutes.

Spread the YUM!